today marked my first full day in austin. it was quite an experience, full of good and bad. let me tell you, i have never felt so comfortable in my life. good, right? yes. well, no. maybe yes, but maybe no. most likely a combination of both, i'm leaning towards no. the day started off with going to austin stone. i never felt so comfortable about being a christian. it was such a safe place to be christian. of course that's a good thing. a church that can create an environment that makes you feel good about being a christian is definitely a plus. i was so comfortable that it made me uncomfortable. i was uncomfortable about being comfortable...why is that?
seeing all these asians here is pretty funny. its like when i was in hawaii this summer for summer project. being asian, i was part of the majority for once. here, i feel so comfortable about being asian. its like i wont ever experience a racist joke ever again from here on out. well, thats a lie. i know thats not realistic, but who dares to mess with an asian when they're outnumbered a million to one. being comfortable in my identity almost makes me uncomfortable. its weird, why is that..
then back on campus im reminded of the same environment as austin stones' as i walk throughout the campus. yesterday i was walking along the campus, and i saw about five christian groups promoting their organizations. i had never seen so many christian fellowships gathered in one place to promote what they believed in. christians are everywhere, and i feel a little uneasy about it. not because i dont like christians, but because christians are so comfortable with being christian, and non christians are comfortable with seeing christians, as if they were just another campus organization among many.
i sometimes wonder what it would be like to live in Jesus' time, after he had ascended up to heaven. imagine if the disciples were as comfortable with their faith as we are. what would it have looked like? they for sure wouldnt have persecuted. peter wouldnt have denied Jesus 3 times, judas wouldnt have hanged himself, and peter wouldnt have been crucified on a cross upside down. how were they able to share the gospel despite their measure of persecution? how are WE not able to share the gospel to the lost despite our lack of persecution? i dont think the 12 disciples would have been able to reach as many people as they did if they lived like we do.
maybe what im getting at is this: why do we strive for a comfortable lifestyle, faith, and future when God calls us to be anything BUT comfortable? in john 20:19 we see how the disciples reacted to the death of Jesus. "on the evening of that day, the first day of the week, the doors being LOCKED where the disciples were for FEAR of the jews..." despite their fear, Jesus returns to them and says this, "as the Father has SENT me, even so I am SENDING you." the power that sent Jesus Christ to die on a cross is the same power that sends us among the people around us.
i write this not because i get it and no one else does, but because i struggle to get it. being a christian in america has been a blessing and a curse, but right now i see it as a curse. sometimes, like now, i just wish i could go to china to experience an uncomfortable faith...
is this not something to rejoice about and to praise God about?! to be able to share FREELY, without fear of persecution.. it should only motivate/encourage us even more so, right?!
ReplyDeletei think sean's more trying to address the sinfulness that arises as a result of how we've blessed with the chance to share freely. there's a balance between contentment and discontentment that is to be sought after. we're wildly blessed, but our own sinfulness makes us too comfortable. we spend time thanking Him for his gifts (which is good), but how often do we offer these gifts back up to Him, leave all we have, and live our lives radically for Christ alone? i think that this sinful attitude of comfort creates a numbness to our sin as well. it's commonplace for non-christians to see christians that are complacent and lukewarm. The prevalence makes our attitudes of comfort seems normal and accepted.
ReplyDeleteboth of yall said it's a blessing to be a christian in america, and yes, it is. i see it like this: we should be content in Christ (and for his provision and grace), but discontent in what we offer up to Him. I don't see the grand "results" of sharing my faith that I hear about from missionaries in China - I'm not subverting a government or being martyred for following Christ. for our bodily safety and health i am thankful, but I find myself deeply discontented with how comfortable I am and how little urgency I have (that's rooted in my own sin, not in God's provision for my safety/health). I am discontent with how I often can't see Christ when the slightest discomfort comes along. Its discouraging to see how easily I succumb to the things of this world rather than seeking the things above, where Christ is.
practically, here on earth, I pray that I can be given the wisdom and strength to have an eternal perspective of this world. I pray that I can be guided to seek after those uncomfortable opportunities/experiences that open my eyes and heart to the passion that others have been graced with daily as they fight for their faith. and that kind of discomfort, the God given, humbling kind, I'm content in that. But this is my disclaimer: we can't become reliant on our situations to grow our faith cause then it just becomes legalism - "if I go here and experience this, then surely I will follow Christ to the ends of the earth." he places all things in our lives for our good, as long as we continue to love Him, and if it means staying put in our comfortable worlds, then so be it.
right on ann and dann, couldnt agree more, or less. but ann, if you wanted to write a blog post, do it on your own blog! jk! thanks for the super long comment and thanks for stealing my thunder. jk again. but thanks forreal
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